Believe it or not, I wrote this while in a very positive relationship. I wanted to see if I could capture the feelings I experienced during a 3 year period where I chose to be celibate and single in hopes of forcing myself to develop emotionally and spiritually, and thus have more to offer in my next relationship. The pay-off was outstanding. I gained more from that experience of celibacy than I ever could have hoped. And I have indeed been able to offer a great deal more in my relationships since then. Yet, man… It was tough, being alone all that time…
Empty Voyage
A darkling vapor neath I lie alone;
I gaze into a sullen sky alone…
My heart deeply eclipsed by vast despair,
I watch the tide of days draw nigh alone…
A shrouding umbrage fallen on my thoughts—
Embittered full of gall, I cry alone…
Within the hollow vastitudes beset,
I dimly witness life pass by alone…
Upon my soul the dim expanses press;
My hope is crushed; I slowly die alone…
I may not know the gentle breath of Spring;
In Winter’s dismal chill I wry alone…
Will no-one hear the music that I hear?
While my heart goes unshared, I sigh alone…
These slopes I scale are treacherous and steep;
I have not strength to climb too high alone…
A blossom yet may bloom within, Zahhar;
Perhaps you will not through life fly alone…
This is my 33rd ghazal.
